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Tag: wedding ceremony planning

The “Standard” Format For Marriage Ceremonies

One of the most-asked questions we receive — right up there with “what the heck am I supposed to do next?” — is actually fairly important:

What is the standard structure of a wedding ceremony?

Most weddings follow basically the same format, with minor adjustments here and there depending upon the desires of the bridal couple. Keep in mind that the bridal couple usually comes up with their own format for the ceremony, but many times you’ll show up and they’ll be looking at you for guidance every step of the way — and you had better be ready with a plan!

Keep in mind that, aside from traditional ceremonies in certain churches (such as in the Catholic, Jewish and Muslim faiths), there is no step-by-step standard format. The bridal couple is free to choose the elements they want to include or exclude, and to customize it any way they want.

No jurisdiction has a law saying what format a marriage ceremony must follow. However, the bridal couple must speak vows declaring their intention to be married to each other (either by repeating vows spoken by the Officiant, or by saying their own vows) and the Officiant must declare them to be married at the conclusion of the ceremony.

After the ceremony, the Officiant must take the couple aside to sign their marriage license, along with the witnesses (if required by local law) to make the marriage official.

A sample “standard” format includes:

Special wedding music begins (this is usually “background” music chosen by the couple, or by the DJ or musicians)
Mothers/parents/VIPs enter and light candles/candelabras
Parents of the Bride and Groom are seated
The Minister/Officiant and Groom enter and proceed to the front
The Bridal Party enters and proceeds to the front
The Ring Bearer and/or Flower Girl enter, proceed to front
Music concludes for Bridal Party
Ushers unroll the aisle runner
The Minister/Officiant asks the audience to rise and welcome the Bride
Music begins for the Bride’s entrance (Processional music)
The Bride and her escort enter, and are met by the Groom
Bride’s music concludes
Opening commentary by Minister/Officiant
Bride and Groom light “family candles” to represent their families
Bride and Groom present flowers to parents and/or VIPs
“Declarations Of Intent” by Bride and Groom
First reading (religious or romantic literature)
Musical interlude (solo, etc.)
Second reading
Special music (musical interlude, or musical and vocal performance)
Exchange of wedding vows (traditional or customized)
Blessing of the rings
Exchange of wedding rings
Minister/Officiant‘s prayer or blessing for the Bride and Groom
Bride and Groom light Unity Candle (music in background)
Final commentary
Bride and Groom kiss
Introduction of the new couple by the Minister/Officiant
Recessional music begins
Bride and Groom exit
Bridal party exits and forms reception line
Minister/Officiant’s instructions to the audience
Audience departs for reception

Sage Advice For The First-Time Wedding Officiant

We received an inquiry this week from a minister who was getting ready to perform her very first marriage ceremony this coming weekend.

Getting asked to perform your first wedding progresses very quickly from “Sure, I’ll do it!” to “Yipes, what do I actually do?”

A wedding ceremony is a beautiful but complex thing. As the designated Officiant, you may not have realized it before, but you’re in charge. It’s the bridal couple’s show, but you’re guiding them through the ceremony. Once you arrive at the altar (or the other designated spot where the vows will be spoken) you’re running things.

What things? Every thing. You’re essentially hosting and narrating the program — you are literally the master of ceremonies! Speak in a voice that everyone can hear, even those in the back row — and especially great grandma in the second row. She doesn’t want to miss a word!

The bridal couple will be following your lead, so make sure that every “repeat after me” is followed by short and simple vows for each of them to repeat. Test it out on yourself, because if you can’t remember more than four or five tongue-twisting words to repeat (with your nerves frayed, and a big audience of family and friends staring at you) neither will the couple!

But that’s not everything

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